Another year gone 

Hi everyone,

Just a quick note to let you all know that I’m well aware that the pages of this blog have been dormant for the last couple of months and I have not forgotten about you! 

Unfortunately, a relapse with my anxiety has resulted in me jumping back onto the anti-depressant medication and I decided it was in my best interest to just focus on my last couple of months of work. 

Getting back into writing on this blog, yoga and adopting a new mindful lifestyle are my main priories for 2017. Whilst I don’t believe in new year resolutions – I do believe in setting goals and working towards achieving positive life outcomes. 

I will be sure to give you all more details about what’s been happening with me over the last couple of months (including my recent trip to Byron Bay, and new found love 💜) in the coming year. 

For now though, I’ll just be enjoying the moment 🙂 

Peace, love and light,

X Cat

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Another year gone 

Reflection

***
2 0 1 5 – the inspiration for my blog stems from a year which brought about a lot of change both emotionally and physically.

Through heartbreak, I gained a new found wisdom and clarity on independence which is now leading me on a spiritual path to healing.

I learnt to be candid about my anxiety and not feel embarrassed by it.

I saw the sights of the world for the time ever and truly found my wings to set me free.

Through my knee injury I realised I need to not only become emotionally stronger, but also physically.

It’s safe to say that tonight will be an emotional closure to the year that was. Some years are meant for learning, and this was mine.

Despite ending the year in a way I hadn’t planned, I take comfort in knowing I will be surrounded by people who do love me, not only tonight but in the weeks to come.

~The grass is greener where you water it~

Reflection

Yet another goodbye

***

Last week I found out that as of the 11th of January I will no longer be employed. My maternity leave cover contract is coming to an end and despite my employers best efforts to create a position for me, this was unfortunately not achievable at this point in time. This is the nature of publishing, and while I’m very sad to be leaving, I’m also looking forward to what the future has in store for me. This has been a dramatic year of change for me personally and I could not have gotten through it without my amazing work colleagues. Thank you for this amazing farewell gift, I love you all so much and going to miss you all terribly.

Each charm symbolises something important to me:

🍍 – Pineapple, because sometimes in life, you have to go through the hard stuff to get to the sweet stuff.

🔮 – Rose quartz crystal assists in healing the heart chakra, loving others, being loved and loving yourself.

🕊 – A feather to symbolise flying away and embarking on a new journey.

💙 – A blue tassel, because who doesn’t love a free spirit and a bit of boho babe within them.

Thank you for such a thoughtful and personalised gift everyone.

Remember – with every ending comes a new beginning.

Yet another goodbye

The first Christmas 

***

I didn’t expect the first Christmas without him to be easy. Any first occasion spent without someone you have loved and lost is understandably difficult. Old feelings arise, you wonder if they’re happy, and more than anything, you miss their family at this time.


For me, the first occasion without him was my birthday back in July. The day was bittersweet. For the first time ever I was overseas, and experiencing my birthday in the summer months, on the beaches of Santorini. But another part of me wanted to be able to call him up and tell him about all the wonderful things I had been experiencing. Deep down, I was still hoping for a happy birthday message. But of course, it never came.

I was feeling like I was in a good place a couple of months ago. I wanted to jump off my medication but my GP advised me not to as many people tend to relapse over the Christmas and New Year period. My therapist advised me of the same thing. Looking back now, I’m glad I did not stop the medication when I initially wanted to. Over the last couple of weeks, I have experienced a range of confusing emotions. It amazes me that a particular time of year can evoke such feelings of longing, hurt and grief.   But at the same time I’m thankful. I’m thankful for my friends who have stuck around – the old and the new ones. I’m thankful for my family who have supported me throughout the entirety of this year. I’m thankful for my GP and therapist. I’m thankful for my cat and my dog, who always seem to snuggle up to me when they sense a melancholy vibe from me. I’m even thankful for him – he taught me to stand up for myself and acknowledge my self worth. But most of all, I’m thankful for myself – for not giving up despite wanting to, for taking care of my best interests and for trying to move on.

 


If you’re feeling down this time of year, my best advise is to surround yourself with those who do love you. Your worth and happiness is not dependent upon one person, even though it feels to be the case at times. You might be hurting, and the pain may not ease right away but you are certainly not alone.


From the bottom of my heart I wish you all a very Merry Christmas. May the new year bring you joy, happiness and good health.

The first Christmas