It’s all in a hug

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After breaking up with my ex I was absolutely petrified to start dating again. To be perfectly honest, I still am. I honestly cannot be f**ked with the methods of new-age dating as it has developed to become superficial, merely for the benefits of instant gratification, one night stands and friends with benefits – no strings attached!

Hey, if you’re into all those things, be my guest, I’m not here to judge … it’s just not my thing – it never has been, and it never will be.

  
The likes of apps such as Tinder and social media generally, have enabled the platform for instant hook-ups to really take off. Upon discussion with a good friend of mine, she noted her brother’s Tinder antics in which he would often sneak out of his parent’s home to hook up with women almost ten years his senior. Again, not my thing – but the point is that these types of relationships are certainly on the rise due to their convenience and their discreet nature. Nobody ever has to know.

It’s safe to say I have become cautious in my dealings with guys. I shouldn’t judge and cast them as ‘all the same’ – but if you’ve been hurt once, you tend to try not be so naïve the next time around. Having said this, I am still open to the idea of finding love again, but in the meantime I need to love myself first and foremost. Yeah, the Biebz was definitely onto something there. Everyone should go and love themselves, and perhaps then we wouldn’t be searching for quick and easy spurts of love that make us feel good in the moment. Perhaps we’ll be too busy going to yoga and meditating and looking within ourselves for solace, at which point the right person will grace you with their presence, without you expecting it because you would’ve been too busy doing YOU. And it will turn your world upside down, and they may make you the happiest you’ve ever been, and it might work out and you’ll live happily ever after … or it might not, and you’ll be heartbroken again and you’ll leave with another lessoned learned. Who knows what your journey holds? All you have to do is keep living and keep painting that blank canvas with every stroke that comes your way.

  
On a lighter note, I went out for the first time in ages on Sunday night. And when I say out, I don’t mean hair tied up in a messy bun, leggings and ugh boots chucked on for a quick dash to the local kebab shop and end up leaving smelling like garlic and Turkish Delights. I went out clubbing with a couple of girlfriends and I have to say, I noticed a pleasant change in the way guy’s handled their interactions with me. We all know I look young for my age, so let’s ignore the fact that 18 year old guys (6 years younger than me and also my sisters age) attempted to hit on me, and let’s just say their methods of interaction are yet to have developed since I was their age, sorry kids – I’m going to focus on the others who made an effort to chat and get to know me, and ask for my number without trying to stick their tongue down my throat.

  
Is it bad that this surprised me? The fact that some guys had the decency (and the balls) to simply ask for my number and expect nothing more? – Possibly.  But I think I had resigned to the fact that most guys on a night out with their friends just want to get in – get out – and boast about it afterward. Oh how wrong I was proven.

To tell you the truth, I can’t remember the last time I had so much fun while out with my friends. We had a laugh, we had a drink and we had a dance. But one particular thing happened that night which has since stayed with me.

I was approached by a guy who alluded to my smallness as his opening statement (mmm okay, nothing new there), but what followed kind of took me by surprise. He so politely and kindly asked for a hug! – I couldn’t say no to that, and why would I want to say no anyway, who doesn’t love a good hug! We got talking, we exchanged numbers and have been messaging ever since.

  
Turns out, he’s been through a pretty tough time too, recently getting out of a ten year relationship. And to think I struggled so much after the demise of my three year relationship. He read this very blog, and took the time to learn more about my past. And we both laughed at the irony of how we both really needed that hug that night, and how funny it was that we were able to comfort each other in that moment without even knowing what each other had been through over the past year.

It just goes to show that a simple act like a nice hug goes a long way. At the end of the day, we don’t know what the person next to us is going through so be kind to one another because you might just end up saving a life. An insignificant act to you may mean the world to someone else, just as that hug meant the world to me. There was something so innocent about this form of contact that it provided us both with just the comfort we needed – without over-stepping any boundaries.

  
So my advice to you today is to go out there and hug someone. Hug your mum, go and hug your dad, your sibling, a grandparent, a friend – heck – even go ahead and hug a random (with their consent) – go and make someone’s day by spreading your love.

Sending happiness, positive vibes and love your way *virtual hug*

X Cat

  

  

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It’s all in a hug

Double edged sword

***

A few days ago, I posted about some issues occurring within my circle, at a time in which I undoubtedly was not in the best headspace.


This week, my spirits are high, and I intend to focus my thoughts in a positive direction so I can attempt to manifest a positive outcome.

I’m happy to report that things might start to be looking up. For the first time in ages, potential job prospects are presenting themselves within my life. I’m excited about the weeks to come and to see what the universe has in store for the next chapter in my life!

I realised that while some hiccups can occur within some friendships along the way, someone will always be lurking in the sidelines, ready to have your back. You know the friends I’m talking about, the ones always up for a good laugh or a good vent. The friends who are your crystal shopping partner & yoga buddy. Or the ones up for a three hour phone conversation, discussing all topics from life, death, love, friends … and of course, the all important topic of Suits (TV show) and sexting (don’t ask!).


I’m beyond appreciative for these people and I’m glad our souls found each other in this lifetime. I do have a lot to be thankful for, and sometimes it’s easy to forget this on our down days. Yesterday, I found myself on a mission to put together a flat pack bookshelf on my own. It taught me two things:

1. I need to hit the gym and work on my guns because screwing things together is more difficult for my chicken wing arms than I had ever anticipated … My bad.

2. I’m not a strong independent woman after all.

Cue the tears and word vomit outburst of ‘what if I never get married and need to build shit!!!! Ahhhh!!’

What. The. F**k. Emotional wreck right?

Call it what you will, but I can look back and laugh now and I find comfort in that. Even if I never do get married and can’t build my own flat pack furnishings from ikea or Kmart, I guarantee one of my sidelined friends will be there for me to lend a helping hand.

It’s okay to feel sad at times, because we’re only human and its normal to experience raw emotion, both the highs and the lows. It’s a double edged sword – feeling so deeply. But I wouldn’t have it any other way.

Love & light to all, chin up – or you’ll lose sight of what matters most x

Double edged sword

Lonely

***

I’ve been debating whether or not to write a post about this but I figured that I wouldn’t be true to myself and my readers if I didn’t share the happenings of my life, feelings and emotions – good and bad.

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Over the past week or so, I have been feeling a little lonely. Not the kind of lonely caused by not being in a relationship – it’s the kind of lonely caused by the questioning of the intentions of those around me. Don’t get me wrong, sounding like a sooky la la is the last of my intentions, and I completely understand that friends and family can get caught up in their own busy lives. But sometimes people choose to knowingly leave you out, or not reply to your message and calls to catch up and that can really hurt. For me personally, communication is key, whether it’s within relationships or friendships – open communication and a receptive listener is imperative.

Having gone to an all-girls high school, I’ve become attune to the shift in vibration when something isn’t right within the friendship circle. Rather than openly discuss any issues – some girls tend to retreat while they build their army and recruit their allies in preparation for the exile ceremony. It’s a sticky situation that’s difficult to get to the bottom of, especially if you’re not on close enough terms to approach them and ask what’s wrong.

It’s been a very strange week for me, and I can only hope that things start to look up. I’m still searching for a paid job and I can’t help but think that if I were working, issues such as this would not be getting to me so much. Despite what happens, all I can do is be myself and continue to be honest and true to those around me.

 

Lonely

Discovering my life purpose

***

Rebecca Campbell’s Light is the New Black was given to me as Christmas present last year by my sister. I have just completed reading it and can honestly say that throughout the course of reading, I recommended the book to about five of my friends. Her words are very inspiring and really resonated with every fiber of my being. She writes as though she is speaking directly to you – woman, to woman – and her inner light permeates the pages. I believe we can all learn how to be true to our authentic selves and she encourages us to do so in the pursuit of spiritual ‘enlightenment’. I excitedly await Rebecca’s second book, due to hit shelves later this year – Rise Sister Rise.

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You know that niggling feeling you get sometimes? The feeling that you should be doing something more with your life than what you’re currently doing? Well, that feeling will never leave you unless you are true to your authentic self. As Rebecca puts it, whether you want to be a singer, a writer, an artist, or whatever it is you want to do, do not wait for someone to give you permission to do it. You are avoiding your authentic self by denying who you are. If you want to be a singer – you already are. Same goes if you are a writer, an artist or whatever your heart desires. You don’t need anyone’s validation because you simply already are. Do not do it for the followers or the likes, do it for you, regardless of the outcome. This is the only way to be true to your authentic self and spread your light like wildfire.

Rebecca recounts a past life regression in which she was transported back to the time, right before she entered this lifetime. Here, she was given her own personal life mission from what she describes as The Councils of Light.

“I was taken to a massive, open, very bright and white space where many other souls were gathering too. While I could not see other ‘people,’ I could see and feel their energy as balls of buzzing, glowing white light…It was like the best reunion you could possibly imagine,” she writes.

What I read next absolutely blew my mind and resonated with my soul so deeply, that it was in this moment I realised what I was put on this Earth to do. It was in this moment I realised my life purpose.

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Suddenly, everything made sense. Why I so passionately perused the field of journalism. Why I had to meet my ex and experience severe heartbreak in order to awaken me from my slumber and begin my blog. That this sequence of events was already written for me so I too, could follow what lights me up, and in doing so, light up the world around me. And it just so happens that I’ve noticed a chain reaction of spiritual awakening around me, in which new people I meet discuss deep and meaningful matters, people come to me for advice on healing and those previously in my life continue to have these discussions with me. And it’s all thanks to my awakening, and the discovery of my life purpose – to help others heal by sharing my own journey, and by relaying important information from experts in the field.

I recently had a reading by Tala Scott at a psychic and wellbeing expo – and she validated this for me. I can’t tell you the immense relief I feel knowing that I have discovered the path which gives me utmost joy. And while it may not pay the bills for now, I write because it lights me up, regardless of the outcome. I have full faith that I can manifest my truest belief, that my life purpose will support me in all aspects within this lifetime.

I want to share more information from Light is the New Black in another post, as Rebecca makes some beautiful points about being true to your authentic self. There is no doubt that this book was meant land in my hands, just as you were meant to be reading this right now. I highly suggest getting yourself a copy of the book but for now, I will leave you with my story and the connection I had to this particular page. Perhaps you were one of the souls at The Councils of Light too?

For daily, thoughtful inspiration, follow Rebecca on Instagram @rebeccathoughts.

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Discovering my life purpose